If you could give yourself the same support you give everyone else, what would your life look like? Not the life where you're constantly putting yourself last. Or the life where everyone else's needs come before your own. But the life where you actually back yourself. Where you trust yourself. And the life where you support yourself the way you support everyone around you. But there’s a real reason you’re stuck.
You probably can't even imagine supporting yourself the way you support everyone else. Because somewhere along the way, you learned that self-support is selfish. That putting yourself first is wrong. That your needs don't matter as much as everyone else's. And now you're here, exhausted, resentful, and wondering why you feel so disconnected from yourself. What if I told you that the reason you're stuck isn't because you don't know what you want? It's because you don't support yourself in going after it. That you haven’t yet backed yourself. You’re not trusting yourself. And you definitely don't prioritise yourself. Not really.
The life you're living right now probably looks like this… You're there for everyone. You show up. You’re supportive. You listen. Then help and fix. You’re accommodating. And you adjust. You’re always compromising. And you do it all without question because that's what good people do, right? Right!?
Except while you're busy supporting everyone else, you've completely abandoned yourself. You don't check in with yourself about what you actually want. You forget ask yourself if you're okay. You’re not giving yourself permission to rest, to say no, or to choose differently. You just keep going, keep on giving, and you keep showing up for everyone except you. And now you're exhausted.
So you continue about life. Helping, supporting, cheering others on. But underneath you’re also resentful. You're disconnected. Because you've spent so long supporting everyone else that you've forgotten how to support yourself. Or maybe you came from a family where supporting yourself was seen as selfish, so never even learned in the first place. It’s a major factor in the real reason you’re stuck.
Let's be honest about why you don't self-support. It's not because you don't care about yourself. It's actually because you've been conditioned to believe that self-support is selfish. In your life journey, you learned that putting yourself first makes you a bad person. That your needs don't matter as much as everyone else's. And you learned that supporting yourself means letting others down. That if you say no, if you choose yourself, and if you prioritise your needs, someone will be disappointed. And you can't handle that. Your worth is tied to how much you give. So you've built your identity around being the person who shows up, who helps, who supports. And if you stop doing that, who are you?
Self-support feels uncomfortable. It absolutely feels foreign. And feels wrong. Because you've spent your whole life doing the opposite. You don't trust yourself enough to back yourself. Because deep down, you don't believe you deserve support. You don't believe your needs are valid. You don't believe you're worth prioritising. So you keep abandoning yourself. You keep putting yourself last. And you wonder why you feel so stuck, so disconnected, so unfulfilled. It just might be inner work time.
Self Support isn't about being selfish. It's not about abandoning your responsibilities or ignoring the people you care about. It’s about treating yourself with the same care, compassion, and consideration you give everyone else. It's about asking yourself:
Self support means backing yourself even when it's uncomfortable. Even when people don't understand. Even when it means disappointing others. It’s time to know the secret… that if you don't support yourself, no one else will. And you won’t be able to build a life that feels authentic, fulfilling, or aligned when you're constantly abandoning yourself.
When you start self supporting, everything changes. Not overnight. Not in some dramatic, life-altering way. But slowly, steadily, you start to shift. You stop tolerating situations that drain you. You’ll be able to stop saying yes when you mean no. You stop putting yourself last. And you start trusting yourself and start backing yourself. You begin to make choices that align with your truth, not everyone else's expectations. The most beautiful part then is that when you start self supporting, you don't just change your circumstances. You change who you are. And become someone who doesn’t:
And that version of you? That's the version who creates the life you've always wanted. Not one day. Not eventually. But now.
These aren't just questions. They're invitations. Invitations to reconnect with yourself. To start backing yourself. To begin supporting yourself the way you support everyone else. Because you don't have to wait for a Life Bomb to force you into self-support. You can choose it. Now.
You can give yourself permission to start right now. When you start self supporting, you'll discover why you've been stuck. You'll understand the patterns, beliefs, and stories that have kept you abandoning yourself. And you'll learn how to rewrite them. You'll finally reconnect with what you actually need, not what everyone else needs from you. And you'll find clarity about what you genuinely want and love. This means you’ll develop the courage to start choosing it, even when it's uncomfortable, even when people don't understand, and even when it means disappointing others. This isn't about wishing for change. It's about creating it. Not in the future. You can start now if you choose to. And it starts the moment you decide you're ready to back yourself.
* The Come Back To You Retreat offers a soul-affirming space to reconnect with your truth and learn how to support yourself the way you deserve.
